Go and Do with Faith

I spoke in church yesterday (Nick did too!). And there's an interesting backstory. Lately I've been thinking a lot about the talks I've been hearing and discerning the differences between the boring ones and the interesting ones.

Mainly -- the people who read and the people who don't. 

Even when they share a personal story, if they read it, it's boring.

And I've been getting excited for an opportunity to speak and do a better job than I did last time.

I generally don't mind speaking in church. It's kind of fun for me to talk to a group,

I like studying the topic and I usually feel good about how I do -- and that's a good feeling.

However, when I first spoke in this ward in August 2017, I did a terrible job.

Waiting my turn, I was excited. Plus I had 20 minutes left when the lady before me finished -- I always like having more time than less. When I'm not rushed, I feel calmer and can add side notes 

to make it more interesting -- and hopefully fun.

But when I stood at the pulpit, the memory of standing at the pulpit giving a talk at my Dad's funeral just 

two months prior overcame me, rattled me, and suddenly I didn't want to be standing there at all.

I ended up reading my talk (the biggest "never do" ever) and it fell flat.

Fortunately, I was called to be a Relief Society teacher and I was able to regain my confidence. 

But my last short talk was for the new year Youth meeting. I had a great talk, but we were trying to squish so many speakers in, I had to keep it to 4 minutes MAX. Again, I had to read most of it. 

So I doubt anyone really listened.

Anyway, I think it's interesting that often you have a feeling you might get a calling, or a speaking assignment before it happens. I can think of at least six times I've known I'd be speaking, or called upon to bear my testimony or receive a certain calling (Primary President the first time).

So my goal for this talk was TO NOT READ except for scriptures or quotes. I came away feeling pretty good.

Go and Do with Faith

We recently received a letter from Chris that said, “I know the Lord blesses us when we do what we are supposed to be doing. We just gotta be looking for the blessings and we will see them.” This made us so happy to see that his eyes were opened and could see how the Lord was blessing him.

As members of the Church we could make a long list of “things we’re supposed to be doing.” It’s making the paradigm shift from “we have to do these things” to “doing these things bring us closer to Jesus which will make us happy” that makes all the difference – but having faith in that principle takes practice.

Every morning I make a To-Do list of things I want to do or I’m “supposed to do” that day.

(I’m a list person and it gives me a lot of satisfaction to check things off my list. Sometimes I even add things AFTER I’ve done it, just so I can see how much I’ve done that day and get to check one more thing off!)

When we have a checklist of “things we’re supposed to do” – especially when it’s a long list, it can feel like we’re “chained to responsibilities.”

But in the Second Nephi, Lehi pleads for his sons to “awake.” He says “shake off the awful chains by which you are bound.” When we do the things the Lord has asked us to do, we’re actually freeing ourselves from chains. Why is this? Because the things the Lord asks us to do are things that will help us be closer to him and to feel his love.

Recently I shared my testimony that I made a new commitment to read my scriptures every day. I’m pretty good at reading them most days, but I’m not good especially when I’m on vacation. I didn’t make this goal so I could check the items off my spiritual to-do list or so that God would be proud of me I did it because when I do, I feel closer to them and I want to show that one of my highest priorities is my relationship with them.

I have a testimony that the atonement was for me. I am moved by “I Stand all Amazed” because I identify with “a soul so rebellious and proud as mine.” Sometimes it’s my natural inclination to bristle when being told to do something. And even so – He cares for me, enough to die for me. I made the personal commitment to read my scriptures every day as a way of saying thank you – that I ALWAYS remember Him.

When I was a new college grad I’d been praying to find a job and going on interviews and finally got an offer. Even though I was excited about working there, when I considered accepting the offer, I didn’t feel good about it. I questioned if I should turn a good offer down. My mother in law gave me wise counsel:  You need to act on Faith and not Fear. We are taught that a negative feeling means no. I had to exercise Faith that the spirit was indeed talking to me. I turned down the offer and within a few days had another job that was much better for my circumstances.

Acting on Faith and not Fear isn’t always easy. It takes practice.

What was the difference between Nephi and his brothers?  Laman & Lemuel complained they didn’t

understand Nephi’s words from their Lord.  But they refused to exercise the faith and effort necessary to obtain an answer.  “Their failure to develop faith in Christ left them to battle their weakness by themselves, ultimately a losing cause.”

When we are trying to do the things the Lord commands, it can often seem hard or even counterintuitive. But with practice and exercising faith to try, we do get better at it. And our testimony that God does answers prayers will grow and give us more confidence the next time.

This testimony is especially important when we’re going through hard stuff.  God can’t take trials away from us. But he PROMISES he will walk with us.  When Joseph Smith was in Liberty Jail, God gave him a promise that applies to all of us, and we’ve all felt this way: “if the very jaws of hell shall gape open the mouth wide after thee, Know thou, my son that all these things shall give thee experience and shall be for thy good… Fear not what man can do, for God shall be with you forever and ever.”

My favorite images in the scriptures are of the Lord extending his hand to help:

1)    Abraham’s life is in danger and cries up to the Lord. The Lord sends an angel to stand by him then tells him he will lead him to a safer place. And not just send him on his own, but promises "...I will lead thee by my hand."

2)    When Simon’s mother-in-law was sick with a fever, he didn’t simply heal her from afar. (Mark 1:31), “he came and took her by the hand and lifted her up.”

3)    And in this week’s Come Follow Me readings he repeats himself over and over to make sure we hear the message that the hand of mercy is extended, no matter our sin or how far we’ve moved away from him: “his hand is stretched out still.”

He doesn’t simply want us to “do what we’re supposed to do.” He wants us to become closer to him so he can guide us to find happiness. And when life puts us up against a task that feels too hard, He will walk with us.

I have wondered if God was really there and have literally felt his presence--darkness turned to light. 

I have been lonely and sat in a Sunday school lesson where the message felt like Heavenly Father was talking directly to me.

I have felt so much joy in the beauty that surrounds me and felt the spirit testifying that this life is a gift.

I have questioned what to do, and felt quiet promptings guiding me. Many times God has seen me through from doubt and confusion, to clarity.

I have listened to talks (podcasts most recently) and shed tears of happiness as the spirit has born witness of truth.

My step-mom has a mantra: “What does Heavenly Father and Jesus do all day? They do us. We are their work and their glory. Their whole purpose is us.”

Most importantly, their commitment to us doesn’t hinge on our level of righteousness. We are given things “to-do” – scriptures, prayer, go to church -- not to check boxes off our list or to see who can do the most. But to give us opportunities to hear whisperings of the spirit over and over and over that God loves us.  He wants us to hear it until we finally believe it.