Confusion.

Our friend and neighbor died unexpectedly yesterday.
It's been sad and surreal. And like its hard to be happy or laugh.
I talked to several friends today and that was helpful for us to talk about our thoughts.

I found out yesterday while planning our Young Women Activity which was going to be "Chopped."
His youngest daughter is 13, in our young women group. His wife is a leader.

It felt uncomfortable to have the girls have a normal "party-type" activity this week. But I didn't want to cancel either. I felt like we needed to gather and talk.
I'm grateful for the prompting I received for the idea to tie a quilt. I hope it will be healing for all of us. I took one of my young women, who is a close friend of the daughter and family, to help choose the fabric so it will be a style and color she likes.

One friend asked today how I was feeling. Sad, obviously. But grateful for my family was also a thought that came to mind.
But that didn't feel quite right. I don't think we have a word in the English language to describe how we're sad for someone's pain but it reminds us to be grateful for our families, but also isn't selfish for being grateful when someone else is in pain.

So the closest I could come up with is "remember" and "appreciate." Remember how fragile life is. Appreciate the moments you have.