Dan's Tribute

Dan's Tribute

E. Martin Shaeffer, Jr.

1931 - 2018

Honor my father by trying to live like him and be like him.

Key attributes:

1. Generosity: Dad was always generous and loved to provide great experiences for his family. Fun trips, weeks in Pagosa Springs Colorado, support for college and educational pursuits. Few quick examples:
   
   1. Always willing to pick up the tab for dinner – no matter who was there (the more the merrier)
      
   2. Always snuck me some extra $$$ when I was home for a break and headed back to college
      
   3. Purchased and gave a Car to Laotian Immigrants who needed help...tough time for him in the 80’s
      
2. Optimism -- saying I use at my company all the time..”you can’t go around looking at the ground...you have to go around with your hands up so you can catch the good stuff that falls into it”
   
   1. At age 55, the real estate crisis of 1987 put a huge dent in his personal balance sheet and business prospects (almost wiped him out), but he didn’t give up. He was optimistic about the future and even told me that it was easier the second time around to get back in the game since he had so much experience. The 90’s and 2000’s were his best decades for his business career as he got into the aviation business and started investing in real estate again. He was the ultimate optimist.
      
   2. He was a great businessman and had great judgment. “He who spoke first bought it”...great negotiating guidance.
      
3. Supportive: Angela and I got married at age 21. He had a strong view that I needed to wait to marry until I graduated from college...but the second I told him I made up my mind to get married and not wait until graduation he embraced the idea and was so supportive of us both. He adopted Angela instantly. Dad loved Her.
   

*During one of our first years of Marriage we traveled together to Albuquerque for a wedding and stayed in the same hotel room. As Angela made her way to climb into bed in the dark she was feeling around and was just getting ready to jump over me...except she had the wrong bed....“Who’s getting into bed with me!” Dad yelled at the exact right moment for fun and Angela jumped a mile! EC and Angela laughed for an hour at least in the dark after that happened.

*You felt like you wanted to brag about everything good you accomplished...he was always so excited to hear about everything in my education, then my career,

then what was happening in my company. He was a great conversationalist and great listener. He used to call to just “hear about all the great stuff we were doing”...made me feel so successful, even in the toughest of times during the last great recession

4. Slow to Anger: It’s hard for me to remember my dad getting angry (I imagine the older kids who may have been a little crazier in high school than I was might have a different opinion). He was always so calm and rational and seemed to have good control of his temper. I can really only think of one time when we was really upset. Airplane experience landing in crosswinds in Clovis, NM when controller called in wrong runway and the winds blew us off the runway. Luckily dad was cool under pressure and was able to give full throttle and get us around before crashing. They sent a car out to our hangar to apologize...I still remember him saying to the person “I had my FAMILY in there”...
5. Loving & Dedicated: Dad really loved his kids and grandkids and he showed it by example as the patriarch of our entire family.
6. 1. Just a few year ago I asked him why he never grew out his beard...he told me that a number of year ago he grew out a short beard one year when we visited him in Colorado. He told me that when he held Courtney (my oldest who is now almost 23) but was a baby at that time she looked at him and started crying so he immediately went a shaved his beard so she wouldn’t be frightened
      
   2. When our son, Marty (serving a mission for our Church in Japan currently), was a high school teenager, I was asking Dad for some parenting advice and his only advice to me was “Dan, just put your arms around him and tell him how much you love him.....”
      
   3. When that same son was assigned by our Church to a mission in southern Japan (you don’t get the luxury of choosing), Dad was deeply moved as it was the same place that he was stationed for some time as a young submariner during the Japanese occupation when he was about the same age as his Grandson (also named Marty).
      
   4. Finally....He has demonstrated an amazing example of love for our mother...they certainly had tough times and struggles...but they stayed together for 60 years...and you could just tell that they were the best of friends...it seemed like it just got better with time. thank you dad for your example of love and dedication to our mother and for your unending love for our own kids. We love you.
      

What a legacy he left for us...we will miss him dearly.